Through the Window

Okay so, im sure I cant be the only weirdo who does this ...do you ever drive past a house and try to see in through the window just a bit to get a feel for what the house looks like inside?? I am so curious and just always wonder when I'm driving in neighborhoods! Perhaps it's time I sign up to be part of neighborhood watch and put my "detective tendencies" (creepy spying) to good use, ha! 

I find that in our friendships, it can be this way too. We desire to know about other people we meet and even those we are more surface-level friends with, so we gaze through windows and form our opinions. 

The problem is, we only see a small snippet when we look in the window. Sound familiar? The highlight reel of social media, a quick interaction that we create a person's whole character around, the word on the street- these are all windows. They tell some of the story, but a very small portion. If we are only gazing through a window, we have held ourselves at a distance. To truly see inside, we have to move closer. 

If we want to get in to and know someone's life, we have to get behind the walls. Now before I lose you because you are thinking,-"This crazy lady drives around breaking into houses"- lol! just hang in here a minute. If we don't choose to intentionally walk up to the door and knock, we won't be welcomed in. And if we aren't welcomed in, we won't be able to see what is behind the walls. And if we can't see what's behind the walls, we won't have a deep and meaningful friendship. 

So this begs the question, how DO we go up to the door and knock, practically speaking? 

I think many things can help-genuine kindness, meeting needs, asking about their life (and caring about and wanting the real answer), but the very BEST way I've found to do it so far is to invite people to MY door....into MY home, to see behind MY walls. Now I don't mean just literally, though that does definitely play a role. Figuratively speaking though, we have to be willing to allow other people into our mess.

I strive to be this way, as I'm sure many of us do, but it is still something that needs work in my life. God graciously continues to teach and grow me in this area, despite my failures and shortcomings. It's hard to share unappealing or ugly things about ourselves. It opens a box of insecurities as we start to take the scalpel to our own life. But you know what? Before we ever get to the place where we invite others to our door and into our home, we must invite God into our home...and heart. He must be the the first to take the scalpel to us! 

This doesn't mean we do it carelessly, and it doesn't mean we need to do it with every person we know. We should always proceed with caution when inviting people closer into our lives! But that can't mean we don't proceed at all because we are too concerned (fearful/prideful) of what the person may discover and how they will respond. 

When we have allowed God to FIRST take the scalpel to our heart and life, we don't need to fear what others may see behind our walls. We can be real, open, honest, and vulnerable because we know we are in a process of growth orchestrated by God, who has searched us and known us fully as we discussed in Bible Study this week. What a relief! God knows us and yet still loves us. This should be a huge confidence booster to combat all the reasons we have to not invite others in!  

When we do invite other women in to our house to see behind our walls and be part of that process, it encourages them to do the same. These are the very closest and most meaningful friendships I have-those where we openly share what's behind the walls instead of just taking peaks in the window. 

We were designed for relationship-first with God and then with each other. I want to encourage you to be vulnerable before God and let Him examine your heart and life! It can be a painful process but it yields GREAT reward.  Then be intentional about invite other women in to see what is going on behind those walls. You may just find yourself surprised when what's behind their walls looks strikingly similar to your house. ❤️